10 Tips to Make TSA’s Security Check as Painless as Possible

Air travel is terrible. There's no sense lying about it to ourselves. Even those who can afford to fly first-class still have to go through the same annoying security procedures as those passengers who are basically taking "the rocket bus to Galveston." For many, flying is a necessary evil brought on by the holiday season, but the joy of taking a brief vacation can be tempered by knowing you have to deal with the airport first. The latest wave of TSA security measures has incited a backlash among people worried about their privacy rights and health, but the best way to deal with these TSA checkpoints is the same as it ever was: be prepared.

1. Wear flip-flops if at all possible: Yes, you have to take your shoes off. Yes, you. It's been more than nine years since 9/11 and since Richard Reid tried to blow up a plane using explosives hidden in his shoe. This is a rule we should all know by now, and acting surprised or indignant about it isn't going to earn you any points from TSA personnel or your fellow passengers. That's why it's a good idea to wear flip-flops or slip-ons whenever possible. If you're flying in warm weather, it's a no-brainer to go with the lighter footwear, but even holiday travelers might want to consider gear that's designed for easy removal. It will save you time and effort at the security checkpoint and get you to your gate faster.
2. Know the procedure: Every time I fly, I'm amazed that the pre-flight speech reminds people that it's still illegal to smoke in airplane lavatories, as if no one on board has flown since the 1960s. Everyone knows you don't smoke on planes. Similarly, everyone knows the rules for getting through the TSA check: shoes off, boarding pass out, no loose change or metal on your person, etc. Your laptop has to be out of your bag and placed in its own bin. These rules have not relaxed in years. If you think they have, you are wrong, and you should get yourself to Google. Doing your homework will help you stay prepared.
3. "Pack it or purchase it": The TSA calls it the 3-1-1 Rule: liquids must be limited to 3.4-ounce containers; containers must be in one quart-sized, clear, plastic bag; one bag per customer. If you want to take larger quantities of liquids — and this includes gels and shampoos — you need to either pack them in a checked bag or plan to buy them when you arrive at your destination. Period. Those are your options. It can often make financial sense to just buy products when you land, since many airlines charge a fee for checking bags in the first place. Regardless of what you choose, the only way to go through TSA hassle-free is to ditch the liquids beforehand, check them in a suitcase, or buy them again later.
4. Get there so early that people will think you're crazy: Trying to predict how long it will take you to get through security is like trying to predict the traffic in Los Angeles: there's no way to know until you're there. For holiday travelers, it's a good idea to add plenty of time to your travel schedule to allow you to navigate the airport crowds and the occasionally lengthy TSA queue without worrying about missing your flight. Show up at the airport two hours before you're scheduled to board, or more if you feel like it. Better safe than stranded.
5. Kill the clutter: TSA agents hate clutter. It looks like a mess meant to disguise something dangerous, even if it's just a pile of cords and items you jammed into your carry-on at the last minute. Bind up long cords like phone chargers with rubber bands, and keep other stuff folded and neatly stored in your bag as it goes through the X-ray machine. If you don't, the agents might open up your bag to have a look at what's inside. The neater your stuff, the quicker you'll be allowed to pass through the checkpoint.
6. Only take the essentials: Do you need that bottle of water? Nope, you can buy another one on the other side of the checkpoint. Ditto magazines, snacks, and anything else you want to distract yourself with on the plane. The more junk you try to take through the TSA station, the more laborous the process will be for everyone around you. (And besides, you'll have to chuck the water anyway since it's more than 3 ounces.) Whatever you're carrying onto the plane, even in your personal item, should only be stuff you need for the flight.
7. Wear the right bra (seriously): The underwire in certain bra cups can sometimes be enough to set off the metal detector. While that might seem irritating, try to weigh it against the threat of a physical pat-down for repeatedly triggering the alarm. Female travelers are advised to choose a different bra in order to pass through the checkpoint more easily.
8. Empty your pockets: Again, this goes back to procedure. It doesn't matter what you have in your pockets, or what you think is safe material that won't trigger the metal detector. The TSA agents have little plastic bowls specifically for junk like change, wallets, cell phones, and other ephemera. Use them and be grateful that the process is as easy as it is.
9. Limit your items: Typically, passengers are allowed to take one carry-on and one personal item. But you don't have to take both, and you don't have to stuff them to the brim, either. Learn to limit the number of items you take through the TSA checkpoint and the number of smaller items contained within, and you are guaranteed to have a better screening experience than the people hauling all manner of purses, backpacks, and rolling carts through the line.
10. Don't be a jerk: The TSA phrases this rule as "think before you speak," but it's the same sentiment. TSA agents have a demanding and thankless job: they repeat the same instructions daily to thousands of people who seem unable to understand the simplest request, and they are required to carry out security checks and personal examinations by their employers, not out of some desire to embarrass you. You don't have to be bubbly or giddy when dealing with security personnel, but you should take a moment to realize that they're just doing a job, and it's up to you to help them do it well and quickly. Don't be sarcastic or rude. Don't get huffy when they ask you to take off your belt like they ask everybody else. Don't make pointless threats. Just don't be a jerk, you know? Traveling is already tough. You don't need to make it worse with a bad attitude.